igod, the compilation

I remember listening to albums, yup those big vinyl things, when I was a kid. I would find one with a song that I loved and I would play that song over and over again, I would play a short part and write down the words, then play another part and write down the words, until I had the whole thing written down and I could sing every word. Thinking back I was never the kind to buy an album and just listen to that one song, no, I would make, yup make, myself listen to the others, the ones I had never heard before, the ones they weren't playing on the radio, and I would listen and learn those too. I was invested in that album!

Thing is today, with ipods and the like, we can download just the songs we like without ever buying an entire album. What are we missing out on? I am sure the artist would like for us to listen to those songs too. To download those too. I wonder about myself. I have stopped buying the whole album. How have I been affected by this cultural shift?

I say all of this because like the ipod/itunes phenomena, people are tending more and more to pick what they want of God and His word and leave the rest. And isn't that just part and parcel to our society? I will pick what I like and what I don't, I have no use for. We only want what will make us feel good about ourselves, not what will challenge or shape or mold us.

Now at the second Sunday in Lent this seems poignant. As a Christian we cannot get away from the cross of Christ. What I mean to say is, many do not want to consider the cross, or what put Christ there, or that we are called to take up that same cross if we are to follow him and that cross was the instrument of suffering and pain. God did not spare His own son that suffering, why should we be any different? Yes, Jesus paid the price, he took the penalty for us but he also calls us to follow him and that following requires death in a sense, death to ourselves and our own wants and desires, death that will lead to new life in him, reconciliation with the Father, and a new heart with new desires far bigger than ourselves and our microscopic views of the world and our place in it.

The season of Lent is meant to be a time of reflection and preparation, of clearing away all that keeps us from approaching the throne of grace freely and unhindered. It is meant to be a time spent in prayer and in fasting, preparing to go to the cross with Christ so that we might get to Easter and resurrection on the other side. You see without the cross there is no resurrection. Without the B side there is no album, just some random songs that leave us where they found us instead of pulling us outside of our comfort zone, outside of what feels good, sounds good, and instead changes us, challenges us, and grows us into the people God created us to be.

Those popular favorites just wouldn't be the same without the B side. It was all part of the artist's work. It all hung together. One informs the other and one brings greater meaning to the other. I know this is true of the entirety of scripture and of God. Take all of Him. Write down the words. Memorize them. Learn the tune. Sing it loud!

Begin again...

Tomorrow starts a new semester, my last spring semester at Asbury. Next year at this time I will be done. I truly have loved seminary. I have always loved being a student anyway, but seminary has been incredible. To have the opportunity to learn what I have from some pretty incredible people doing awesome kingdom work as well as to learn from some on fire brothers and sisters, that have been my classmates has been an honor.
It has been incredibly challenging to be a full time graduate student along with working and being mom to two young girls. It has taught me so much, not only in book knowledge, but mostly in who I am and who I am not, who God created me to be. I have learned about my gifts and I have learned about my weak places. I have learned so much about who I am because I have learned more about who God is and frankly as my Creator he knows me better than anyone else. This "knowing" has less to do with books and more to do with absolute reliance on him to carry me through this process. Honestly, I never imagined, at any point in my life, doing what I do now and will do to a greater degree as time goes by. I have tried to resist,made lots of excuses, because, really none of this is easy, but at the same time the rewards are immeasurable and eternal,so how could it not be awesomely wonderful?

I have always been so excited to start a new semester, hungry to know more as soon as possible. This is the first time I don't feel that. I don't know if I am just worn out or if it is the thought of finishing that causes me to hesitate. If you are reading this, say a prayer for endurance to finish the race that has been set before me. Thank you!